Woot.
Doing project now..
Hai.
I wanna sleep....
But need to do project....
Arrgh.

Interview yesterday....
No,
2 days ago (It just turned 12AM) went pretty okay....

Was damn nervous!!
Worse than playing a solo,
I tell you...

I was already super duper nervous when I reached the place,
Heart thumping like crazy even when I changed my school pass for a visitor pass @ the site.
Then went up,
Handed in my documents for administrative work to the staff at the registration counter.
Then sat down and wait lo....

The place was so quiet....
Many people were there...
Can see some people from the working class...
Remembered my mom telling me that there would be an increase in the working class people going for interviews as the economy is bad now,
Which made me worry even more.

The person before me was... whoo.
Made me damn scared and self-conscious....
He was in for a VERY long time,
And actually made the interviewers laugh!
All the good signs of being chosen....
I was like, "My goodness... This person is sure to get the job...."

I was wishing very VERY! hard not to be the person after him.
Come on....
For someone who left a lasting impression on them,
No doubt that their (the interviewers) expectations must have been raised up....
I don't think I can be like him....
It's very difficult for me to 'relax' and 'be myself' on formal occasions like this one...
I just feel it IS appropriate for me to be professional and.... not take things so lightly??
But honestly,
I really admire those who can really be themselves in such conditions....
Hai.

Anyway,
The man came out happy as can be,
With audible laughs coming from the room even after he shut the door.
The receptionist stood up,
And I braced myself,
Wishing hard that I wasn't the next one.

"Miss Lok Jie Jun, it's your turn."

I could have died on the spot.
"OH NO." was the 1st reaction.
I was so stunned that I just stared at the announcer,
Wishing that there was another person in the holding area with the exact same name as me.

The person then looked directly at me and said,
"Miss Lok, it's your turn."

OMG.

I was so nervous that my legs were like shaking,
And my mouth was so dry,
Felt like someone stuffed a whole pack of cotton balls in my mouth all the way down the throat.
This feeling lingered during the whole interview,
All the way till I stepped out of the room,
Collected my original documents,
Exchanged my pass back to my student pass,
And out of the building.

There was one point of time where my mouth was so dry that I can't even speak....
Opened my mouth and spoke,
But no sound came out...
ARRGH.

Anyway,
The interviewers were nice people,
Smiley and encouraging.
But still,
I can't help feeling nervous....
My brain machiam dead,
And the answers did not come out as smoothly as I wanted it to be.

AND,
What's worse,
I screwed up at the last question.
Didn't really get what one of the interviewer asked.
Arrgh!
Felt damn stupid sitting there facing the interviewers,
Can only try to answer.....
And halfway through my answer,
I realized what they were actually asking.
But it's too late,
I've already given my answer to them....
T.T

Told a friend about it on the bus to school,
My friend said that my answer is not exactly direct,
But IS relavant....
Told me its alright,
And not to worry.

Mom asked about the interview when we went to buy groceries @ Ubi Central just now.
Baby with Dad @ home.
Told me not to worry and brood about it....
If cannot, can try again...

Hai...
Damn worried....
I wanna get chosen.
But among the mass of thousands....
Will I be one of the lucky few??
I only dare hope.