Today was kind of a bad day for me...
Not with my family,
But with friends.

Some of the words used are really...
Ouch.

Anyway,
I ended up blocking 5 people on MSN,
3 for making me upset,
2 for irritating me.

I know it's bad of me to do that...
But I'm really at knife point...

Don't worry though,
It's only temporary.
I'll unblock them before I sleep.
When I wake up,
It's a new day for me.

-----

Anyway,
Many things are occupying my mind right now.

2 major things happened for the 2 to 3 weeks I didn't blog.
1 good, 1 bad.

1) Trisha jie and gorgor are getting married!!!
Registered liao wor!!
=D
CONGRATZ!!!!!





2) Popo (Xiang's grandmother) passed away on Wednesday.
I didn't know it till Thursday.
Her sudden death really upsets me,
But what really made me feel bad was that I wasn't there when Xiang needed me.
Nor were the others.
He did try calling me on Wednesday,
But I was having lessons that afternoon till evening.
And I didn't return his call.
I'm really cursing myself now. Wished I had.

Found him under my block when I came home on Thursday.
Had a good long chat and cried with him.
Popo is a really nice person....
I was shocked that she went, cos I was just having dinner with her last week.
Went to her funeral on Saturday before Kim Seng,
After NYPSO's Welcome Tea.

Supposed to meet Yuan for dinner,
I was rushing down on the taxi alr,
He told me he going band room 1st.

Well...
Okay.

Since I'm already in the taxi,
Told the uncle to change the destination and I go for awhile lo.
Yup.
Was in no mood for anything else after that,
But still.... Went KS to relax and get myself perked up.
Cos I really need it.

-----

Haha.
Emo, emo.
So many things on my mind.
Probably the stress from everything?
Band to school to personal issues.
Damnit.

Just thinking of him is already enough for me.
For some reason,
He's been appearing in my mind,
Especially when I'm alone.
Heck being eating,
Lying in bed,
Looking around outside....
I really don't know.

Recent events make me upset.
Even happy ones.

During Trisha's church wedding solemnization,
I suddenly felt like crying aloud.
Nono,
It's not about them getting married.
I'm happy for Trisha and gorgor.

It's about....
Him.

I remembered the things we talked about.
Like what we're gonna do 10 years down the road,
What the both of us would probably be.
Our jobs?
Would he be a musician?
Help out in Mike's company?
Would he be in America?
Or Singapore?
What would I be?
What about the both of us?

10 years...
At that time,
We calculated that he'd be 29,
And I'd be 27 then.
I could remember the things we discussed.
We made and worked out the different plans for the future,
Whichever option we took.

The future is scary with loads of uncertainty,
But there were things we talked about that were promising too.

I was very worried at one point.
But he just said,
"The thing is to take things a step at a time.
There's no point in brooding over what might happen.
If things turn out bad, we'll just tackle it slowly one by one.
Who knows? Things might turn out better than expected."

Adults may say that they are just 'kids' dreams',
But it meant a great deal for both of us.

Now you're gone with everything,
And here I am, alone.
How do I tackle this stone, Davian?
How?
I don't have confidence in this,
Dave.
I really don't.